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Avocado jokes don’t have to be the pits. Check out this collection of clever avocado puns that will have you laughing your hass off!

Avocados have become the “it” food in recent years. It’s the ubiquitous super food that goes with tacos, salads, burgers, and now toast. Find the humor in avocados and guacamole by pairing it with a punny joke.

Whether it’s for a text message, instagram caption, or a simple one-liner to make you smile, there’s sure to be the right avocado joke for your situation.

Here are 25+ Funny Avocado Puns Guaranteed To Guac Your World

25+ Funny Avocado Puns That Will Guac Your World

Avocado Puns

  • Forget weights, it’s avo-cardio day
  • You have a avo-can do spirit!
  • Bravocado!
  • I’m avocontrol!
  • Avo good one!
  • And they lived happily avo after
  • Domo Avocado, Mister Roboto
  • I’m an avocad-hoe

READ: The Spec-Taco-ler List Of Taco Puns In Queso You Need It

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  • Avocadon’t get me started
  • You’re everything I avo wanted
  • Avo a great birthday!
  • I avocadon’t care
  • Things are allripe for now
  • A move in the ripe direction

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Guacamole Puns

  • Rock out with your guac out
  • You guac my world
  • In a while guaco-dile
  • That’s got guac-ward
  • I’m between a guac and a hard place
  • It’s guac-tail hour!
  • You have guac to be kidding me
  • I’ve hit guac bottom
  • Here I am, Guac you like a hurricane!

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Hass Avocado Puns

  • Kiss my hass!
  • Hass, queen!
  • Hass, if!
  • Hass, we can!
  • The time hass come
  • Thanks for your hass-pitality
  • Looking for Hass stuff baby this evening!

Avocado Jokes

  • Why did the avocado go to the dentist? Because it had a guac tooth!
  • How do you know when an avocado is ripe? When it’s a-peeling!
  • Why did the avocado break up with the banana? Because the banana wasn’t ripe enough!
  • Why did the avocado go to the bar? To get smashed!
  • What do you call an avocado that’s been blessed by a priest? Holy guacamole!
  • What do you say when an avocado proposes to you? “Lettuce get married!”
  • What did the avocado say to the toast? “You complete me!”
  • Why did the avocado go on vacation? To get some pits and quiet!
  • Why don’t avocados ever get into fights? Because they always try to be a-peeling!

Avocado One Liners

  • It’s okay, guacamole, I’m extra too”
  • “Spread avocado, not hate”
  • “I’m all avo that avocado toast life.”
  • “I’m an avocado, not a miracle worker.”
  • “I’m pretty pit-ticular about my avocados.”
  • “I’m not ripe yet, please don’t guac me out.”
  • “I’m just here to avo good time.”
  • “Avocado, because sometimes toast just isn’t enough.”
  • “Happiness is a ripe avocado.”
  • “Avocado: because life is too short for bad guac.”
  • “I’m just a small-town avocado trying to make it in the big city.”
  • “Avocado: the fruit of our labor.”


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